As I convalesce, I hang out with Margie and Lynx; I more or less drop out of the larger, online world
Friday, July 20, 2012 at 6:17PM ;)
I feel quite incapable of spewing many words today, so I will just note that what you see here is representative of the sights around me during this week of convalescing. While we do get a few gimpses of Caleb everyday, and usually his new special friend, Monica, as well, it has been mostly Margie, Lynx and me.
Lynx is just the most amazingly good natured baby there could ever be. He seldom cries and is almost always in a good mood - smiling, chuckling and growling like a little baby bear.
I have never heard a baby growl the way Lynx does. He growls all the time. His is a very good-natured growl, though and could not be perceived as a threat by anybody.
;)
Truth is, though, I spend much time all alone. Even when I do not feel I need to sleep, the chairs and couches in the living room tend to quickly become too painful for me to sit long in, so I will retreat to my current bunk in the guest room, plug my headset into my iPhone, turn on the music and retreat into it. My tastes are pretty eclectic, so the music goes all over the place from Bach and Beethoven to Bob Dylan, Miles Davis, Robert Johnson, Lead Belly, Buddy Holly, Native American Indian and Eskimo and others
I have Mozart's Requeim primed and ready to play and have been eager to hear it but so far I have not been able to make myself push play. It is such an incredibly beautiful piece of music that I want to hear it, but it really lights death up in bright darkness and I am just superstitious enough to hold a tiny fear that if I submerge myself into it I might just pass on through and find myself shaking hands with Mozart himself.
I'd love to meet him one day, should such a thing be possible, but not just yet.
;)
Lynx has just woke up. With a little help from Margie, he rises from his cradle board.
He gets dressed. Then he and Margie take a short walk with me.
We made it to the pond. This pain and soreness in my gut makes it difficult to walk, and some have advised me to hold back, but the doc says walking is the thing that is going to put my system back in order and restore me and it appears to me that he is right, so I make certain to take two or three short walks a day.
When I first got home, I tried for four to six, but that was truly too much. I had to cut back.
;)
Lavina finds it very hard to be away from Lynx all day. She came out and spent Tuesday night with us. Last night, she came back, bundled him up and took him home Today she and Lynx returned, got Margie and went out and bought a motorized recliner for me.
It is hard to describe how uncomfortable and painful the simple acts of sitting and even lying down tend to be for me right now. I can never be on my side or tummy, but always on my back or sitting trying to find support for my aching back. I think the recliner is going to help significantly.
Last night, I took my last, very short walk at about 10:30, under a sky so delicately beautiful as to seem of another realm. I'm afraid we are losing daylight fast now and soon night will be night.
One thing I feel a little bad about and hope people understand is that I have largely dropped out of the larger world - even the online world. It may not seem like it takes all that much energy to keep up with all one's favorite sites, blogs, Facebook and such, but when you find yourself in this situation you find it does. I have not been able to spare the energy, so I have largely retreated. I hope I have not offended anyone.
;)
I do not plan to post over the weekend. Earlier, I mentioned that shortly before I went in for my planned surgery, I uploaded several pictures into into a draft post. I had planned to write the text from the hospital, on the second or third day after my surgery. I did not understand how daunting a task this would prove to be. I thought it would be easy. I would just lie there in my hospital bed with my laptop on my lap and do it.
Ha!
Now, I hope to post it Monday. I will work on it off and on over the weekend.
It all has to do with this place, 800 Sarah's Way, Wasilla, Alaska - the place where, come March, should we still be here, we will have lived for 30 years; the place where we raised our family and helped our first three grandkids get a start in this world.
Now, our continued presence here stands in severe jeoprady. I have a couple of ideas about launching and seeking funding for projects that, if we can weather the immediate, seemingly unweatherable, storm, might enable us to hopefully forestall or altogether evade the impending disaster. I do not know if my ideas are good or bad, but I am going to present them and see if I might reach someone interersted enough and funding-savvy enough to help me figure out how to find the funding.
Reader Comments (8)
Bill, I understand your retreat, and think you are doing the right thing. You need to heal not only in body, but in mind and spirit as well. Keeping your family in my thoughts.
While I'm happy to read you're healing and see pictures of Margie, Lynx (xoxoxo) and Lavina, I feel heartsick reading the end of this post. I wish there was something I could do to help. If there is, please let me know. Please pass on some hugs and kisses to Kalib and Jobe too.
Retreating is sometimes necessary. Do what you have to do. You offend no one.
Everything hurts because you need your stomach muscles to do anything. You've had invasive surgery in that area, so I totally understand the pain. I hope you continue go improve.
I love that the Lynx growls! I was always sure that Jobe was the most amazingly good natured baby there could ever be. Little by little your strength will sneak up upon you.
When you rise in the morning, give thanks for the light, for your life, for your strength. Give thanks for your food and for the joy of living. If you see no reason to give thanks, the fault lies in yourself.
Tecumseh
If folks had said they were offended because I had energy only for my self when I was recuperating from being very ill a few years ago I would have said Pffftt! to them.
If anyone is silly enough to say something like that to you, I would say Pffft! to them too.
Somehow though, I think most folks , certainly those of us who visit here, only want to know how you are doing and will check in regularly for updates as you can make them.
People always told me that I would gain patience with age. That has not been true, by and large. I am less patient with so many things than I ever was in those long ago days of youth. The exception is living almost patiently with those things only time and quiet get us through, like now.
Best wishes, Bill.
Will check in but don't expect to hear from you until you have the energy to spare from healing. And do, please, save up meeting Mr Mozart for some years yet. Please.
Sending all good wishes, and all good things will come to you. You who have given so much to the rest of us, thank you so much! God bless.....
Yes, of course I'm offended. Pfttttttt! Silly man. Stay away as you will and heal. That's always first & foremost.